? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
