Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
