im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
