Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Randomize
