Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
