I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
