i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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