if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize