You work out of a Hotel?
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
