R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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