Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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