We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
