He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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