i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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