We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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