dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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