# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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