the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm always down for nudity.
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