We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Just invented taco cereal.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
