At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
