sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
