quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Randomize
