I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
