The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
