I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Everything about him screamed your future.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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