His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
