We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Boobs are out for the taking
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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