It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
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