hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
My ass is underappreciated
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
