this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize