he wants to bone in the snuggie
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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