He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize
