Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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