Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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