you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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