i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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