Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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