Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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