I cannot find my penis.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
