Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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