You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You were trust falling into bushes
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize