the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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