He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
