You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
