He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize