we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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