why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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