dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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