so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
PANTIES FOUND
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