5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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