So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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